This is the family that needs a treatment
The W Family
The W family was referred to this community based agency to see if improvements could be made in the family situation. Otherwise it would be necessary to remove the children from the home according to Child Protection Services worker who was making the referral. The W’s were reportedly open to the referral. Nonetheless, there were numerous difficulties in arranging an interview; they failed three appointments due to unexpected problems with the children. The W’s are a bi-racial couple. Mr. W African- American and Mrs. W of Italian and German descent. They live with their three children, Simon, Jarrod, and James. A fourth child, Sam, died of sudden infant death (SIDS) two months ago at 2 months. Donald and Terry have been married for five years although they have known each other since high school. There is a great deal of conflict in their relationship; they fight about money, childcare, Terry’s drinking and Donald’s infidelities. Terry always suspected him of “cheating” on her but she received confirmation when she contracted gonorrhea from him. Donald claims that he only “cheater” on her twice and feels that she should drop the subject. She brings it up whenever he wants to go out without her because she thinks that he’s going out to meet other women. He says “just going out to get a break from the kids”. This is reflective of their communication pattern in general.
Terry has been diagnosed as having alcohol dependency since age 18 after a DUI and has been able to abstain from drinking in the past, having stopped drinking for part of her last pregnancy. She began to drink again when Sam died. She entered Deter at ECC to stop drinking at that time and she would like to enter now. Donald is opposed to this idea; he thinks that she can abstain on her own if she truly wants to “dry out”. Donald is working in an unskilled position; his wages are low. When Terry was working, it was easier to make ends meet. She quit her job during her last pregnancy. She worked as a “topless dancer” in a local nightclub. Donald would like her to return to work but she is reluctant to do so because she says her job contributes to her alcoholism. She cannot dance unless she is intoxicated. She drank a quart of Jack Daniels daily and frequently used cocaine when it was available to her. She is evasive about her current drug usage. Terry claims that Donald likes her to drink with him and that he often encouraged her to join him when he was drinking with friends, saying that “she is a drag when she’s dry”.
Finances are especially tight lately because Donald had a hernia operation about six weeks ago and has not received any disability or other assistance. Since he has been home, they have fought about childcare. Apparently, the children have been left alone for long periods of time. There have been several calls to Child Abuse Hotline by neighbors and by Mrs. W’s mother. There appears to be cause for concerns about their being unattended because on the morning of our first appointment we arrived at 11: 00am as scheduled. There was a long wait at the door until Simon answered. He was dressed only in a T-shirt. He was preparing breakfast for himself and Jerrod. Donald and Terry were still asleep when we arrived. Terry admits that fights with Donald over finances and his infidelities have occasionally become violent sine Sam passed away. She has stated that she has been hit by Donald on more than a few instances, and that he has left bruises and cuts. She has not sought medical attention for this, nor has she called the police when this has occurred. She has feared that if the police intervened, her children would have been taken away from her. Neighbors have often heard both Terry and Donald yelling and creaming when the children are home. At times, the children have been crying very loudly. One of the neighbors has called Child Protective Services during these incidents.
When Donald and Terry are not fighting, often times they are not speaking much at all. Terry has tried to spend more time with her children since the many phone calls to the Child Abuse Hotline. However, she has felt that she has failed as a mother. When she has told this to Donald, he has told her “you just need to try harder”. Terry has come to feel that her husband doesn’t understand even when they not fighting. Lately, she has withdrawn, only speaking to him when necessary. They do not talk of the death of their son and change the subject when Sam is brought up. Terry has become sullen, often sleeping, crying, or drinking. When taking care of James, James often cries. Terry has taken to leaving James in his room crying while she goes back to sleep. At these times, Donald gets frustrated and leaves because Terry will not talk to him.
Both Donald and Terry come from troubled backgrounds. Donald’s father abused alcohol and severely rejected, Donald, the family scapegoat. Donald has reported being close to his mother and brother, though he had limited contact with his father until his death. Donald has relied on his mother for help with care for his children as well as services for the burial of Sam. Donald recently became angry with his mother she told him she concern about Terry’s drinking. Since then, their relationship has been strained. Terry has lost a great deal of trust in her mother-in-law who felt like a surrogate mother to her. Donald’s mother has remained active in her grandchildren’s lives. Donald’s brother has just finished graduate and started working. He has helped Donald financially, and has been a loving uncle to Donald’s children. He has often them to the park, playgrounds, and for ice cream in the summer. Terry has a highly confliction relationship with mother. This stems in part from the sexual abuse by mom’s boyfriends and live-in partners. The first occurrence was when Terry was five years old; these continue until she left to marry Donald. Terry’s mother has denied that any of this has occurred to her daughter, and has refused to enter to enter into counseling with her daughter. Terry has been reluctant to her other to watch her children, especially at her mother’s house. Terry has done so, however, on limited occasions when no alternatives have been available provided that her mother come to her house. On this last instance, her mother called the child Abuse Hotline. Since then, Terry has had no contact with her mother and has had increased resentment toward her. Overall, there is limited extended family involvement with Simon, Jerrod, and James. Donald and Terry have had few family members to rely on for childcare or other extra support.
With the recent occurrence of domestic violence in the home, Terry’s alcoholism has become more of a difficulty for her. Neighbors have reported that Terry is too intoxicated to care for her children. One neighbor observed her passed out on the front porch while Donald was not home. Her children were playing unattended. Jerrod was almost run over by a car, but the neighbor removed him from the street. Jerrod had been attending daycare. However, because of their financial situation, Donald and Terry can only send him three days a week. The last few times Jerrod has attended, he has sat silently at a table.
There have been additional concerns about the children. Simon’s preschool has been calling Terry repeatedly as he has been coming to school dirty, hungry, and wearing the same clothes. On many days, Simon has not attended. His work has also declined. He has had difficulty focusing and concentrating. In addition, his interactions with his peers have changed. While Simon was previously polite and took turns, he has begun yelling at other children. On a few recent occasions, he hit his peers without provocation. The teacher noted that this was a drastic behavior change for Simon. When she spoke to Simon, he told her “my daddy hits my mommy.” The teacher at this program also called the Child Abuse Hotline and made an allegation of neglect.
Because of the increased reports to Child Protective Services, concerns arose over the safety and care of the children. The Child Protective Services Worker substantiated the report of neglect of the W children by both parents.
Credit:ivythesis.typepad.com
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