The Pros and Cons of a May-December Love Affair
“Age doesn’t matter”. This is one of the most commonly used slogan of lovers for like a century. But, we were used to seeing man as the older one when it comes into relationships. And, when he’s older than the woman, he must not exceed ten years older than the woman. But how did this rule in relationships come to occur? Is it only me who have never seen the constitution and by-laws of lovers? Or, is it everyone?
Yes, it is everyone who has never seen that kind of constitution and by-laws because it doesn’t really exist. It is only our elders who make those kinds of norms, consequently erroneously believed by most of the following generations.
As we try to analyze it, there are only a few reasons why the society looks down to the May-December affairs. When one is much older than the other in the relationship, taking for example: the woman is older than the man for eleven years, there would always be some instances that their likes and dislikes don’t meet up. If the guy of twenty-plus dates a woman at her thirties, they couldn’t go gimmicking together like hanging out to the clubs because of the thirties already see clubs not ideal for their age and that those places are so noisy. In that case, the guy would argue with the woman about her not acceptance of his world. He may misunderstand the woman’s idea about his going out.
Another con in a May-December relationship is that the older one, especially when she’s lived a good reputation gets very timid about the relationship to the public especially in the beginning because she stereotypes that everyone doesn’t agree with them going out, having the big difference in their age. That would really be a conflict.
Also, in this relationship, there would always be times that the older one is the captain of the ship and that she must always be the one to decide because she’s the one who’s wiser in the duo. This is a kind of control of the relationship that is difficult to handle. Although the younger one wants to do something for the relationship, there would be moments that he’ll be left like an immature and irresponsible being, since he’s younger. In that case, that would cause the younger partner to become dependent on his older partner and their relationship. That would cause him to knock his self-esteem off.
Most notably, the cruelest part of the relationship would likely to happen. That is for the younger one to look for his age or even younger. Since, he is with an older one, there is always a possibility that youth would tempt him for youth. And since the elder sees the relationship more stable because she’s a t the age of seeing it as it is, she’ll stay at her place to please her guy, leaving her the possibilities that a dim light triggers.
But then again…”age doesn’t matter”.
For those who are in this relationship, they see this kind of togetherness as unique. Yes, it may be because not everyone sees the essence of a May-December relationship. But this relationship may be sweeter than any other thing in this world.
Every man has a boy within himself. He hides it because of machismo. But, when he’s with the person he loves, he tends to be more secure and he reveals himself more openly. That’s the way every man is. Then, in a May-December relationship, she is more likely to display some motherly love to her man, whether she understands the need of every man or not. Every man, though they admit it or not, always wanted that there’s someone whom they know could act as his mother and show her love unconditionally towards him.
Also, being unaccepted by the majority because of the norms and misconceptions, the duo involved in a May-December relationship try so hard in order to be accepted by the public. Most of them don’t really care if they are termed as eccentric, but others, since they’re seen as part of the society, still struggle so hard in order for them to be blessed by the public (although they know that it doesn’t really matter at all) and especially by their friends and love ones. In this sense, they do their best effort for each of them to stand strong and keep the faith burning in each one’s heart.
A May-December affair may sound absurd to most of the people, but we should not be that chary of what the people involved are happy about. They are humans, and there never a rule that had ever been established or acknowledged about the age of couples. As long as both individuals involved in the relationship are at their right legal age to decide, they are, by all forces of nature, have the right to love and be loved in return.
Credit:ivythesis.typepad.com
0 comments:
Post a Comment